Falling in love is one thing, and maintaining a relationship is different altogether.
Once you are in a relationship, even though you consiously wanna give ample space to each other, you tend to grow possessive about your partner over time. Well, that's ok as long as it doesnt become an obsession... OR SO U THINK!!
As time goes by, you tend to get involved more n more with each other.. your work life, your party time, the amount of alchohol content in your body, the color of your teeth, body odour, everything becomes important to you, and that you want to see ur guy/gal to do the best he/she could probably can about all this. There are people who say, once you are in love, you share all your happiness and troubles; HAPPINESS is ok, but what about the TROUBLES??!!
Nowz the age of Google ( or am I still not keeping up with the time??!! ), where one doesnt need to go to another for directions anymore. Just type the From and To addresses and it gives you a detailed direction (even if it says you gotto swim 3000 miles from detroit, to reach the shores of Scotland!!) The Drivers now do not need Navigators, for they have the entire Map, Directions, and GPS system connected to their Car, they are good to go a 1000 miles!! OH REALLY??!!
Now this is where I start relating Relationships with the Driver-Navigator Partnership. Even though the Driver holds the steering of his car, he needs a Navigator to ensure he takes the correct turns and exits at the right point in time. If some situation occurs along the drive, the Navigator can easily assist the Driver out of a possible mishap, the Navigator cares for the Driver, and he cares for himself as well!! remember he's in the Car too!!! Now, IS THIS SAME WHAT THE DRIVER THINKS??!!!
I dont think so... The Driver, being behind the steering, thinks he has full control of his car. Agreed. But when it comes to where to steer, he's guided by his navigator on the directions. This gives the Navigator some control of the car. Now, the Driver may not like the Navigator taking the call on where his car has to go!!The 100% control he had on the Car is not there anymore!! :(
The driver's of the opinion that the Navigator is now taking control of his Car!!
This may exactly happen in a relationship too!! There's a Driver, a Navigator, and the Car is the Driver's life!! When outside a relationship, the driver always had his freedom to take his life anywhere he wants to.. do wateva he wants to. But this also had possible risks, wateva he did with his life was his complete responsibility... take all the wrong turns, and somehow make it back... Now, he has the navigator to worry about too!!! And the navigator wants to ensure that the drive of life with the Driver is a smooth one for him....
The open question now is, is the Navigator wrong in ensuring the driver's life, along with his own, is smooth and not bumpy? or is the Driver wrong in asking for Complete control fo his life?!!
Each relationship is different from one another... Its your call as partners to decide whats best for you... drive alone?!! allow the navigator to give directions?!! or the navigator should help the driver only when their life's are at risk, even though the drive's taking long with all the wrong turns n taking further time to reach your destination...
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3 comments:
Ofkors, navigation is as important as driving itself, cos u might end in places u dint want to reach if the navigator wasn't around to guide the driver.
Its back seat driving and not navigation that will set the driver off. So, the navigator should basically know when navigation becomes back seat driving.
Its not wrong. I think, in due course of the drive, all navigators tend to do that, unintentionally. It just happens. You start doin...u kno...keep left-keep left hand signals...and pointing out small things...indicator nahi lagaya...(driver thinks ..."tht was just a right turn, and there was nobdy behind me")dont change lanes so often...stick to ur lane.. (driver is jus gettin bored n sleepy lookin at the straight long road...jus wants to move arnd so tht he stays awake..isnt tht important?)
Its also has a great deal to do with the maturity levels of teh driver n the navigator. If the driver is fresh n new to driving, u kno...taking control of things for the first time, jus wanna zoom a drive, take a brk..or jus time off...or jus wanna enjoy this new thing. But the navigator has been doin it for long, so has lost the taste or thrill of it. For the navigator its all abt reachin places....safely...n stayin within rules. But may not be the same with the driver.
Initially its sweet...cute when navigator shows so much interest and concern and starts to back seat drive. But the driver matures too. And at some point he is gonna look for his space.
Basically, we are all different. And its unfair to expect ppl to understand the other person telepathically. (I know some are good at it, but some lik me, are bad). So, when the driver feels that navigation is becoming back seat driving, then the navigator must understand. It doesn’t mean you stop navigating, but just let the driver make turns on his own.
Ok.. so lemme get this straight...
what you mean to say is that the navigator should stay low and keep quiet... when the driver's having his way... even though he knows that the driver is making life dangerous for both himself and the navigator??!!
Talking about maturity, m not talkin double standards here. The navigator is the driver of his life too.. and they swap places in his car.. and the same thing applies to him too!!
Well, taking turns on his own... as long as its not a wrong turn.. the gez the navigator should be ok.. but if the driver keeps taking the same wrong turns over and over again... please advice what the navigator shud do!! :P
What i wanted to say is that the Navigator is a part of ur life, have some care about him too... He's not your paper towel which u use only to clean up your shit!!
do i sense some hostility here????
are u both fightin??? :(
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